:On Mirages & Actuality

You get a heartache in most cases –but this one was different.  I felt her entire body take over my mind.  My chest no longer racing against the clock; rather heaving up and down in time with hers.  I felt my hands stiffen in quiet wait –as if to beckon her to change.  She was no longer my figment.  My peace of mind; she had become my same.  We were connected at the waist in so many ways.  I felt her shudders in the deep of the night.  I knew the moon had looked the same for us both –but how we were so far apart.

 Even to this moment –this very typing and striking away at letters that do not fit my mold; I see her.  Cuddled up against the cold of a pillow…in the heat of the night.  I can see pass the glare and the car lights that play with my ceiling.  All now I look for is the tiny cove in her back.  The subtle curve from her nose to her upper lip.  I was captivated by the thought that she could be here too.  Yet I knew; even if my mind had lost itself and only my desires could take form.

That my truth was still better now than it has ever been.  I was seeking and had found.  Taking in all the scenery of a beauty so fine.  Grounded down to the basics.  The quaint getaway I grew to love in her wake. So here we are I said to her.  And she did not move an inch.  I cried that night –more than ever before.  And I knew when I woke.  She’d be no more.